A few days ago I’ve managed to give myself a black eye. Actually, it wasn’t exactly I that gave me the black eye, it was a giant box of cookies that I’ve managed to get all fumbling and flipping through the air and thus smacking myself right across the face with it. Oh, and that happened at work. So of course, there were witnesses to this graceful act.

And this isn’t the first time I’ve been attacked by inanimate objects while trying to eat either. That one time a refrigerator door fell out of its hinges and got cushioned by my conveniently placed forehead. Which was also at the same work.

Come to think of it, maybe our office feng shui needs a bit of realignment.

So anyway, about food. Are you still trying to go through leftover ham from Easter? I definitely am. So in order not to waste a single thing, I came up with this dish. Of course, this batch can feed like a dozen people, so feel free to scale down. Or make space in your freezer if you have trouble with assessing quantities like I do.

INGREDIENTS:

(Yields about 10 servings / 0.51 EUR per serving / 5.09 EUR for all)

1 large onion (0.10 EUR)

4 tbsp sunflower seed oil, divided (0.03 EUR)

2 enormous potatoes (1.07 EUR)

3 large carrots (0.27 EUR)

½ head kohlrabi (0.13 EUR)

3 garlic cloves, minced (0.10 EUR)

1 head of kale (1.07 EUR)

2 cups diced ham (2.00 EUR)

½ cup tomato puree (0.13 EUR)

1 bay leaf (0.03 EUR)

1 tbsp sweet Hungarian paprika (0.07 EUR)

Good pinch of hot pepper flakes (0.07 EUR)

Good pinch of salt (0.01 EUR)

8-10 cups water (–)

2 tbsp all purpose flour (0.01 EUR)

METHOD:

Wash, peel and dice all the vegetables. In a large pot, sauté onion on high heat on 2 tablespoons of sunflower seed oil until slightly translucent. Add in diced potatoes, carrots, kohlrabi and minced garlic and give everything a good stir. Cook for a few minutes and then add kale, ham, tomato puree, bay leaf, paprika, pepper flakes and salt. Just a small heads up, though, if your ham is salty, you definitely want to go easy on the salt. Cover everything with water, give a good stir and bring to a rolling boil. Once boiling, reduce heat to low and cook with a lid cracked open for 30 minutes. Then taste and adjust seasoning.

To thicken the stew, make roux in a small saucepan on medium heat, by adding flour to remaining 2 tablespoons of oil. Mix constantly for a few minutes, until the flour becomes golden and starts smelling nutty. Remove from heat and slowly and carefully ladle in some liquid from the stew, while stirring constantly to prevent lumps. Then when you have a thick and evenly creamy mixture, pour everything into the stew, give it all a good stir and cook through for a minute or two.

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Pred par dana uspjela sam si napraviti šljivu na oku. Tehnički, nisam si ju sama napravila, napravila mi ju je ogromna kutija kolača koju sam nekako uspjela prevrnuti i okrenuti u zraku i raspaliti se sa njom po faci. To mi se naravno desilo na poslu. Tako da je taj gracijozni čin imao i svjedoke.

Ovo čak nije niti prvi puta da su me napali neživi objekti dok pokušavam jesti. Jednom je moje čelo uspjelo ublažiti pad vratima od frižidera koja su ispala iz šarki. A što se također desilo na tom istom poslu.

Sada kada malo razmislim o tome, možda naš uredski feng shui treba malo kalibracije.

Uglavnom, idemo na hranu. Da li i vi pokušavate pojesti ostatke uskršnje šunke? Ja definitivno da. Pa kako se ništa ne bi bacilo, smislila sam ovo jelo. Naravno, ova količina dostatna je za nahraniti deset ljudi, pa slobodno dodajete manje svega. Ili si oslobodite mjesta u frizeru, ako kao i ja imate problema sa procjenom kvantitete.

SASTOJCI:

(Za oko 10 porcija / 3,80 kn po porciji / 37,96 kn za sve)

1 veliki luk (0,75 kn)

4 žlice suncokretovog ulja, podijeljene (0,20 kn)

2 enormna krumpira (8,00 kn)

3 velike mrkve (2,00 kn)

½ glavice korabe (1,00)

3 češnja češnjaka, sitno nasjeckana (0,75 kn)

1 glavica kelja (8,00 kn)

2 šalice kockica šunke (15,00 kn)

½ šalice pirea od rajčice (1,00 kn)

1 lovorov list (0,20 kn)

1 žlica slatke paprike (0,50 kn)

Dobar prstohvat sušenog čilija u pahuljicama (0,50 kn)

Dobar prstohvat soli (0,01 kn)

8-10 šalica vode (–)

2 žlice brašna (0,05 kn)

PRIPREMA:

Operite, ogulite i narežite na kockice svo povrće. U velikom loncu, na jakoj vatri i 2 žlice ulja, prodinstajte luk dok ne postane staklast. Dodajte narezane krumpire, mrkvu, korabu i sjeckani češnjak i sve dobro izmiješajte. Kuhajte tako par minuta, pa dodajte kelj, šunku, pire od rajčice, lovor, papriku, čili i sol. Samo mala napomena, budite oprezni sa solju ako vam je šunka već slana. Sve prekrijte sa dovoljno vode, dobro promiješajte i pričekajte da zavrije, a onda smanjite vatru na srednje jaku i kuhajte 30 minuta sa odškrinutim poklopcem. Kušaje i prilagodite začine.

Da zgusnete varivo, napravite zapršku u malom lončiću tako da na srednjoj vatri pomiješate brašno sa preostale 2 žlice ulja. Stalno miješajte par minuta, dok brašno ne dobije zlatno-smeđu boju i ne zamiriši. Maknite sa vatre, pa polako i oprezno malo po malo u zapršku dodajte tekućinu iz variva, konstantno miješajući kako se ne bi napravile grudice. Onda kada imate gustu i jednolično kremastu smjesu, zapršku istresite u lonac sa varivom, dobro promiješajte i kratko sve prokuhajte još koju minutu.